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Would You Choose YOU on a Dating App?

Updated: Jan 26

Over the years, dating apps have become a popular way to connect with potential partners. Using online dating as a metaphor, we meticulously browse through profiles (interact with others) and, seek out those who pique our interest, possesses qualities that we find attractive and with whom we feel a sense of connection. But in the pursuit of seeking those qualities in others, do we ever ask ourselves, "would those individuals find those same positive qualities in me??" Would they "swipe right", or would they... swipe left??

Attractive Qualities in Others

Let's briefly consider the qualities and traits we often find attractive in others. Physical appearance may initially catch our eye, but genuine attractiveness goes far beyond mere aesthetics. We are drawn to qualities like kindness, intelligence, a good sense of humor, empathy, confidence, and ambition. However, the key is not just to seek these qualities in others but to cultivate them within ourselves.

The Power of Self-Reflection

Self-reflection is the process of examining our thoughts, actions, strengths, and weaknesses. It's about being honest with ourselves, acknowledging areas where we can improve, and celebrating our strengths. Taking time for introspection allows us to gain a deeper understanding of who we are and what we want from life and relationships.

Recognizing Our Flaws

We all have flaws; it's part of being human. But rather than ignoring or denying them, we should embrace them as opportunities for growth. It takes courage to recognize our weaknesses, whether it's being too critical, insecure, or closed-minded. By acknowledging these aspects of ourselves, we can begin to work on transforming them into positive qualities.

Continuous Self-Improvement

Once we've identified the areas in which we can grow, it's time to embark on a journey of self-improvement. This involves setting personal goals and actively working towards them. Whether it's learning a new skill, addressing emotional baggage, or practicing better communication, self-improvement is a never-ending process that enriches our lives and relationships.

Cultivating Positive Traits

On the flip side, there are qualities we may already possess that are highly attractive to others. Nurturing these attributes further can make us even more appealing on the dating scene. For instance, if we are compassionate listeners, we can strive to become even more attentive to others' needs. If we have a passion for learning, we can share that enthusiasm with potential partners.

Developing Self-Love:

Self-love is not about arrogance or conceit; it's about recognizing our inherent value as individuals. When we love and accept ourselves, we radiate confidence and contentment, which can be incredibly appealing to others. Embracing self-love also allows us to approach relationships from a place of emotional stability, fostering healthier connections.

Building Genuine Connections:

By choosing to work on ourselves and becoming the best versions of who we can be, we set the stage for genuine and meaningful connections with others. Instead of seeking someone to complete us, we become two complete individuals coming together to enhance each other's lives.

By focusing on self-improvement, cultivating positive qualities, and practicing self-love, we can present the best version of ourselves to the world. Ultimately, the journey of self-discovery and growth will not only lead to healthier and more fulfilling relationships but also to a more fulfilling life overall. So, the next time you look in the mirror, ask yourself, "Would you choose “you” on a dating site?"

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